Too much time at home makes for annoyingly needy furbabies.
Finally in desperation, I did the cat-equivalent of turning on cartoons for a preschooler: I opened the catnip/toy storage drawer and let Bridget explore.
She was quiet for a long time. A veeeeery long time. When I went to check on her an hour later, I found her sleeping away (until I took out the camera, of course):