Friends vs friends

I just learned last night that my warm feelings for Facebook are not shared by my husband. Honestly, it caught me a bit off guard at first to learn that he’s deactivated his Facebook account.

Well, it’s just another obligation. Check this, report that.
But you had several friends there! They’ll miss you.
No they won’t. They know where I really am.
Now that I think about it a bit more, this makes perfect sense. And not just because my husband is more of an introvert than I am.
When we first explored Facebook, Kelly commented on individuals who have – literally – hundreds of friends. How is that possible? he wondered. And why would you want that many friends? How can you keep up with them all in a meaningful way?
What he’s really saying is this: In life, you have Friends and you have friends.
friends are people you’ve spent some time with. They are people you interact with on a regular basis, or did at one time.
Friends are people you cry with. They are people you spend significant time with. You share your lives, your struggles, your hopes and your dreams. Friends know you.
So which would you rather have? 227 friends on Facebook or 5 truly great Friends that you can count on for everything?
In deactivating his Facebook account, my husband made his preference clear. So don’t be offended if you were one of his friends in Facebook. Odds are, you actually are a Friend and he won’t let you lapse.
And to tell the truth, I think I would much rather be loved by a truly great Friend the way my husband cares for his Friends than to have 227 people in my Facebook account and not much else.

2 Comment

  1. Don’t you think the idea of “friends” on Facebook is something of a status symbol, too? (The more so-called friends you have the more popular you MUST be? Ugh!)

    I have to say, though, Facebook has enabled me to reconnect with a couple of very dear and must loved friends from high school that I had lost touch with.

  2. You are probably right, Mel. Like counting coup.

    I have reconnected with some old school (high school and college) friends as well – that’s the one good part about Facebook. I just don’t like the “I knew of you in school, so let’s be friends” Facebook friends.

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